He is married. Now what?

A friend got involved with a man who is already married.

At some point, I am glad that there is a man who is willing to listen to her stories and to be there for her when she needed someone to talk to.

My only worries is how will the relationship ends.

It is only perfect if they ended up in marriage. Regardless that love is to be shared. And every single significant thing in life, needs to be divided into two. And may turned into, three or four.

Hence, some tips if you ever get involved with a married man.

1. Be sure of what you are getting into.
Accept the fact that you going to be hurt and lonely, once in a while. You must not go into that relationship in order to conquer and destroy his marriage. There will be many people involved; his kids, current wife/wives, his in-laws, parents, friends etc. Not only you and him. Maintain the thought that you are not destroying the family/happiness of others but to complement them.

2. Is he serious enough?
Try and figure out what are his intentions. Some married men simply likes to flirt. Do not interpret that wrongly. Nonetheless, there are some who are serious enough about marrying another woman and they know for sure that they are able to sustain the relationship (post-marriage), financially and emotionally. There is nothing wrong with asking the man about his intentions. Some man gave reasons that their marriage is in trouble so they are looking for a way out. A man would faced his problems not run away from it.

3. Meet up with his wife.
Ask to meet up with his presence. If he is serious enough, this is not really a big thing. After all, you would need to maintain good relationship with the wife later; ultimately both of you will be sharing the love of the same man.

In life, sometimes, you just can't avoid falling into relationships. You can only plan and that is just it, the most that you can do. But do plan so that you'd be the one sought after not the one seeking. I'll cover this in future entries. God's willing.

Ultimately, Allah decides who shall be your partner in this life.